What is the stress and growth of the enneagram 4? Find out in this blog where we break down the enneagram type 4s stress and growth numbers!
What Is Enneagram Stress And Growth?
As you probably know, the enneagram is shaped like a clock with lines connecting each number to 2 others. These lines represent our stress and growth. When we are in stress, we take on the behaviors of a different type and in growth, we take on the behaviors of another.
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Our enneagram type does not change as we move between stress and growth. Our core desire remains the same however, how we try to fulfill our core desire changes based on whether we are in a stressed state or in our growth.
The Enneagram Actually Grows Both Ways!
We actually are supposed to grow towards both numbers that our enneagram type is connected to, taking on the healthy aspects of both types. And vise versa, we can be stressed and take on the behaviors of either number we are connected to but there is a number that we need to reach into for more growth and one we reach to more easily in stress.
In this blog, we are covering what the stress and growth numbers of the enneagram 4 are including signs that you are in stress, signs you are in growth, and how to step into your growth. Enjoy!
Enneagram 4 Overview
The enneagram type four is called The Individualist. Your core desire is to be unique and original.
Common traits of a 4 are…
- Possibly Melancholy
- And Whimsical
As a 4, your core desire comes from the fear that if you aren’t unique, people will forget about you. Going with the masses and hiding your emotions don’t come naturally to you.
Enneagram 4 In Stress
In stress, the enneagram 4 takes on the negative traits of the enneagram 2, The Helper.
The normally authentic and creative type 4 becomes selfless and responsible. Instead of embracing their individuality and using it to serve the world, the type 4 in stress forgoes the things that make them unique and focuses on helping others.
While helping others is a kind act and can be fulfilling, an enneagram 4 in stress does from a place of insecurity, they serve because they believe they aren’t wanted for who they are.
Enneagram 4s are meant to be artists, using their power of emotional expression to inspire others to express themselves too. But an enneagram 4 in stress gets the feeling that who they are will not be accepted and so they choose to hide who they are and self-sacrifice to satisfy others.
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As the enneagram 4 is part of the Shame Triad, shame is the trigger for type 4s to go into stress, specifically, the feeling that who they are is unworthy of acceptance.
The type 4s core desire is to be express themselves and be understood, whether that’s comes in form of poetry, aesthetic Pinterest boards, outfits, music, work, or talking to a loved one. When they feel that they are going to be judged, a type 4 goes into their selfless, type 2 stress by becoming an empathetic, caring friend and ignoring themselves.
Signs You Are An Enneagram 4 In Stress…
- You find yourself playing the role of “mom friend” or parent
- You feel your ideas & emotions are unwelcome around others
- Focusing on taking care of others
- Lack of creative flow
- You feel the need to “fit in”
- Hiding your authentic self
- You repress your feelings
- Having trouble staying focused on what you want
- Ignore your desires & goals
- You have a strong need for people to like you
- Tired or depressed
- Feeling misunderstood
A type 4 goes into stress by having their childhood wound triggered. A situation happens (,or many situations) where their childhood belief of “my authentic self is too much for people, I’m unwanted” is brought back to the surface and so they go into survival mode to avoid being harmed.
Should type 4s avoid situations entirely where this belief may get triggered? No, that would be ridiculous. Mindfulness is key here. If we can notice when our childhood beliefs get triggered and pay attention to the negative behaviors that we start using in reaction to it, then we can start healing ourselves and work on stepping into growth.
Enneagram 4 In Growth
In growth, the enneagram 4 takes on the positive traits of the enneagram 1, The Perfectionist.
The emotionally deep and expressive type 4 embraces impartiality, order, and, most importantly, values. An enneagram 4 in growth learns what they value in themselves, others, and the world and unapologetically aligns to them.
The best word to describe type 4s growth is simply choose.
A type 4 in growth will choose what they want to feel in a situation, rather than being overwhelmed by their strong feelings. They choose who they want to be rather than what seems to be acceptable in their social groups. A type 4 chooses everything they want in their life instead of feeling stuck to what they’re supposed to be!
Type 4s are a great inspiration to the world, but it takes them stepping into their growth number of the type 1 to transcend their heavy feelings of shame and embody their authenticity. They to learn to follow their gut like the type 1s to make the best use of their expression.
An enneagram 4 in growth also learns to see the world as it truly is by embracing their growth. Type 4s tend to see the world as a drama, because of their core desire to feel all the feels. Often times in stress, the type 4 can seem to think that life is a hopeless journey were they are meant to suffer.
But in their growth number of the 1, enneagram 4s learn to see life through a lens of clear judgement and neutrality like a 1. In doing so, an enneagram 4 becomes empowered, goes after what they want, feels fully confident in who they are, and finds more gratitude everywhere they go.
Signs You Are An Enneagram 4 In Growth…
- You feel unapologetically authentic
- Going after your dreams
- You feel your emotions and then let them go
- Feeling a sense of gratitude and control over your life
- You don’t make excuses
- Fearlessly expressive
- You feel welcome for who you are in your friend group
- Joy and freedom
- You can plan and organize your life
- Not feeling stuck in your head
- You embrace the little things
- You feel that you understand yourself
Stepping Into Growth As An Enneagram 4
So how can we move from stress into growth as enneagram 4s? To 4s, this growth number can sound ridiculous. “You want me to be an orderly and emotionless 1? I want to be expressive and feel!”
We think that our growth number means that we have to forgo our personality but this is not the truth. Type 4s, you are meant to be your expressive and creative self and it would be ridiculous to ask you to be any different!
Remember that growth for you, type 4, isn’t about just about the actions you do, it’s about the mindset you embrace.
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We can often think we are stepping into our enneagram’s growth number by doing different things on our reality when, in fact, we are just avoiding change.
While the enneagram 4s growth is about being organized, the deeper part of the Individualists’ growth is about learning to balance the scales of life and become stable.
The core of a type 4s growth means learning that you should pay attention to your emotions and feeling your feelings is a gift, but your emotions aren’t you, they are a part of you. Type 4, you are your desires, your ideas, your values, your actions, and so much more.
While you should recognize how you feel, don’t let your emotions control everything you do. Actively seek balance in your emotions and intellect.
A healthy 4 learns to recognize when they are feeling pulled into those familiar sad emotions and say “okay, I recognize how I feel right now. I understand why I feel this way and I know that feeling this way is okay. But how do I want to feel? What do I truly desire? And what value will I uphold myself to? “
Try recognizing any time you start utilizing a “victim mentality” as an excuse to feel down or cope with feeling stuck in life.
A type 4 can embrace their growth by gratitude journaling, repeating worthiness affirmations, defining their values, and by setting life goals and then setting intentions for their day based on those goals.
Give yourself permission to leave what is heavy behind.
When you are in your stress and forgoing your sense of self, ask yourself “what would I do if I believed I was worthy no matter what? How can I script a more positive present and future?”
How do you step into growth as an enneagram 4? Let us know in the comments. Hope this blog helped you understand the stress and growth of the enneagram 4!
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