Discover everything you should know about the Enneagram 3 personality type, also known as The Achiever by reading this blog!
What Does It Mean To Be An Enneagram 3?
Being the enneagram 3 means you grew up believing that you were only valued for your achievement. Similar to the 1, type 3 builds perfectionist tendencies and becomes hyper-critical of themselves. Now, as an adult, the type 3 is an over-achiever, obsessive about success, work, or sports, and has a hard time allowing themselves to be authentic. As they are used to “deceiving” people.
If you are an enneagram three, you are known as The Achiever. You are driven, ambitious, and poised. As a 3, your core desire is to succeed because, in childhood, you were taught that you would only be valued for your achievements.
Enneagram 3 Description
The enneagram type three is known as The Achiever. The 3 is characterized by their ambitious, driven, and poised role they take on. If you are a 3, your core desire is to succeed because, in childhood, you were taught that you had to be the best to be wanted.
Traits of an Enneagram 3
The 3, as part of The Shame Triad, wants to be liked by everyone. And the 3 believes that the way to be liked by everyone is to appear successful, attractive, and unique.
This makes the type 3 commonly described as poised, social, and friendly yet intimidating. When the 3 speaks, they can be very persuasive and inspiring. They naturally have a speech tendency to try to “sell” you on whatever they are saying.
You’ll never catch these people slipping on their words. The 3 does their best to appear charming, like-able, and admirable.
Your wings also play a huge factor in your behavior because your wings determine your behavior. Read our blog on the 3’s wings, click here.
Enneagram 3 In Stress
A stressed enneagram 3 is highly critical of themselves, obsessive, and doesn’t allow themselves to rest. But when they are under extreme stress, they take on the negative traits of the Enneagram 9 and become unmotivated, depressed, and indulgent.
Each enneagram type has specific signs that they are under stress! They take on the negative traits of a different number in stress.
The driven and ambitious type 3 becomes depressed, unmotivated, and indulgent when they are stressed.
It takes a lot to push the type 3 to their worst stress signs due to the fact that their core desire is achievement. The 3 will maintain a high level of stress in their pursuit of success and easily stay motivated.
But when the 3 gets pushed too far, the type 3 takes on “fake rest.” They will lay on the floor doing nothing because they are so burnt out, scroll through social media, or sleep excessively yet still feel tired. A type 3 in stress becomes like the 9 in that they forgo their true desires and they choose numbness over real rest.
Read our blog on the 3 in stress and growth.
Enneagram 3 In Growth
The Enneagram 3 in growth incorporates trust, rest, and play into their being. They take on the healthy traits of the Enneagram 6 by embracing that they are worthy of connection as they are and without achievement.
Each enneagram type has specific signs that they are in a healthy state of growth! They take on the positive traits of a different number in growth.
When the Enneagram 3 embraces their growth, they allow themselves to rest and spend more time having fun with friends.
The type 3 embraces the healthy parts of a type 6 in growth by focusing on loyal connections and believing that they are enough without success. They know when they’ve done enough and it’s time to rest. A type 3 in growth will not only see themselves as enough for others, but see others as enough for them
Get my top self-care tips for the Enneagram 3!
Enneagram 3 Common Mistypes
Some of the Enneagram types are very similar to one another. This is why it’s important to take your time and learn about each type before you type yourself!
If you think you might be an enneagram 3, you should look into popular mistypes for the 3. Commonly, type 3s can see themselves as their 4 wing because they feel misunderstood and feel like they have to be someone they aren’t around others to fit in.
But type 3 can also commonly mistype as the 1, 5, and 8.
Find out more about the Enneagram 3’s common mistypes in this blog
Try Our Enneagram Test
Enneagram 3 Subtypes
In the enneagram, there are three variations of each type called Instinctual Subtypes.
These 3 subtypes are determined by the 3 major survival instincts we operate on.
The SX Enneagram 3 (Sexual 3)
The SX type 3 wants to be seen as an attractive partner. These people appear more charismatic and charming than any other type. The SX type will take center stage wherever they are to be liked by everyone. It’s extremely important to the 3 that they appear as a desirable partner. This subtype can also be the most aggressive.
The SP Enneagram 3 (Self-Preserving 3)
The Self Preservation subtype makes any enneagram type subtly quieter due to the desire to preserve the self. The SP 3 is the most focused and reserved of the 3’s subtypes. To the SP 3, monetary success is the most important form of success. SP 3’s want to preserve their resources, home, and time to pursue their goals.
The SO Enneagram 3 (Social 3)
The SO 3 wants to be a part of a powerful community. Having the approval of friends, colleagues, and social circles is extremely important for the SO 3. This subtype is the most image-conscious of all the 3’s subtypes.
What An Enneagram 3 Needs To Hear
Dear enneagram 3s, we are sorry that we made you believe you were only valued for your achievements. We want you for who you are regardless of how you show up. You deserve to let loose and have fun.
Enneagram 3 Romantic Compatibility
The Enneagram 3 will get along the most with enneagram 5s and 9s. The 5 respects the 3s desire to achieve and is very independent. And the 9 reminds the 3 to make time for relaxation.
The enneagram type 3 will be drawn towards other types that allow them to focus on their goals and are highly autonomous.
Commonly, the enneagram 3 will seek out type 9s who are easygoing and accept the type 3 exactly as they are. The 9 also is highly independent and just wants their partner to be happy.
However, 3s can commonly also enjoy the company of 5s (depending on the subtype) because both can be straightforward and factual.
The enneagram 3 could also potentially be drawn to enneagram 1s because both are perfectionists.
Find out more about the Enneagram 3 Compatibility (coming soon)
Best Careers For An Enneagram 3
Because the Enneagram 3’s core desire is to achieve, the type 3 can’t help but want to climb the social ladder.
Potentially fulfilling careers for the 3 would be…
- Professional Athlete
- Managerial Roles
- Business Owner
- Videographer/Photographer (Great at managing people, executing a vision, and being creative)
The Enneagram 3 seeks out a career where they can be autonomous and harness their perfectionism. They make great Professional Athletes, CEOs, First Responders, videographers/Photographers, and Business Owners.
What questions do you still have about the Enneagram 3? Let me know in the comments below!
Grab the free enneagram cheatsheets before you go to learn everything you need to know about each type.
- Enneagram 3 In Stress & Growth
- The Nine Enneagram Types: Which Type Are You?
- Most Common Enneagram Mistypes
- Enneagram 3w2 VS 3w4 Comparison: Which Wing Are You?