Enneagram 3 In Stress & Growth

Published Categorized as Enneagram
Enneagram 3 Stress and Growth

What is the stress and growth of the enneagram 3? Find out in this blog where we break down the enneagram type 3s stress and growth numbers!

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What Is Enneagram Stress And Growth?

As you probably know, the enneagram is shaped like a clock with lines connecting each number to 2 others. These lines represent our stress and growth. When we are in stress, we take on the behaviors of a different type and in growth, we take on the behaviors of another.

Our enneagram type does not change as we move between stress and growth. Our core desire remains the same however, how we try to fulfill our core desire changes based on whether we are in a stressed state or our growth.

The Enneagram In Stress and Growth
Here’s a visual of what the enneagram looks like. Each line represents our stress and growth.

The Enneagram Grows Both Ways!

We are supposed to grow towards both numbers that our enneagram type is connected to, taking on the healthy aspects of both types. And vice versa, we can be stressed and take on the behaviors of either number we are connected to but there is a number that we need to reach into for more growth and one we reach more easily in stress.

In this blog, we are covering what the stress and growth numbers of the enneagram 3 are including signs that you are in stress, signs you are in growth, and how to step into your growth. Enjoy!

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Enneagram 3 Overview

The enneagram type three is called The Achiever. Your core desire is achievement and to be the best. 

Common traits of a 3 are…

  • Ambitious
  • Driven
  • Competitive
  • Focused
  • Goal-Oriented
  • Professional
  • Strong-Willed
  • Like-able
  • Charming
  • And Diplomatic

As a 3, your core desire comes from the fear that if you aren’t the best then you are unworthy of love. Flaunting your authenticity and “chilling” don’t come naturally to you.

Enneagram 3 In Stress
This is what the type 3 looks like in stress.

Enneagram 3 In Stress

In stress, enneagram 3 takes on the negative traits of enneagram 9, The Peacemaker.

The normally driven and confident type 3 becomes tired and selfless. Instead of achieving their real dreams, they get pulled into people pleasing, achieve what society or others want them to, forgo their sense of self, and end up burnt out.

While resting is something 3s desperately need, in stress, the type 3 takes on “fake rest.”

They will lay on the floor doing nothing because they are so burnt out, scroll through social media (secretly looking for more marketing strategies in the process even though they say they are doing it for rest), or sleep excessively yet still feeling tired.

A type 3 in stress becomes like the 9 in that they forgo their true desires and they choose numbness over real rest.

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Enneagram 3s, check out our Enneagram 3 gift guide before you go by clicking here!

Enneagram 3s are meant to be leaders, creators, achievers, and do-ers. But an enneagram 3 in stress believes that their real dreams and authentic self will not be accepted. So they choose to achieve goals that give them approval from society or, in the worst case, no goals at all.

As the enneagram 3 is part of the Shame Triad, shame is the trigger for type 3s to go into stress, specifically, the feeling that without success, they are unworthy of acceptance.

Enneagram 3 Achiever Journal

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The type 3’s core desire is to reach new heights and be as good as they can be whether that’s through work, self-growth, or sports. It is good for 3s to do this, it fuels them. But this becomes expressed negatively when they go into their type 9 stress, they go after what everyone else wants them to achieve to feel like they are enough.

Enneagram 3 Stress Growth Commparison
Take a look at the short description for Enneagram 4 stress and growth

Signs You Are An Enneagram 3 In Stress…

  • You find yourself constantly tired
  • Frustration
  • You feel you can’t express your real dreams to others
  • Good at making others feel good even though it makes you feel terrible
  • Lack of inspiration
  • You feel the need to be someone you’re not
  • Hiding your authentic self
  • You repress your feelings
  • Over-working yourself to the point of exhaustion
  • Focused on menial, unimportant tasks
  • You feel unworthy and unloved no matter what you do
  • Life feels hopeless
  • Insecurity

Type 3 goes into stress by having their childhood wound triggered. A situation happens (, or many situations) where their childhood belief of “I have to win to be loved” is brought back to the surface and so they go into over-achiever mode to avoid being abandoned.

Should type 3s avoid situations entirely where this belief may get triggered? No, that would be ridiculous. Mindfulness is key here. If we can notice when our childhood beliefs get triggered and pay attention to the negative behaviors that we start using in reaction to them, then we can start healing ourselves and work on stepping into growth.

Enneagram 3 In Growth
So what does growth look like for Enneagram 3?

Enneagram 3 In Growth

In growth, the enneagram 3 takes on the positive traits of the enneagram 6, The Loyalist.

The driven and professional type 3 embraces trust, authenticity, and, most importantly, support. An enneagram 3 in growth learns that they are worthy of connection as they are and without achievement.

The best word to describe type 3’s growth is enough.

A type 3 in growth will feel a strong sense of inner knowing that they are enough. They know when they’ve done enough and it’s time to rest. A type 3 in growth will not only see themselves as enough for others but see others as enough for them.

Enneagram 3 Stress And Growth
These are some signs that you are in stress and growth, enneagram 3.

Type 3s have dreams and visions like no other, but it takes them stepping into their growth number of type 6 to truly share those dreams with others by building their support system.

They find the people they can be loyal to and authentic around and this strengthens both their motivation and happiness in life.

An enneagram 3 in growth versus in stress also learns to find real rest through grounding.

Type 3s tend to see the world as a race that they have to be the fastest in. Often in stress, type 3 can seem to think that they have to run through life alone and that they don’t deserve to enjoy living.

But in their growth number of the 6, enneagram 3s know that they deserve to live life and share it with other people. In doing so, an enneagram 3 becomes present, fulfilled, feels fully authentic in who they are, and finds more true success everywhere they go.

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Signs You Are An Enneagram 3 In Growth…

  • You feel rested
  • Authenticity
  • You honor your emotions
  • Feeling a sense of connection to others
  • You make time to play
  • Aligned goals over bigger goals
  • You don’t feel the need to always “do more
  • Creative flow feels open
  • You get to be spontaneous and joyful
  • Not feeling stuck in the future
  • You find presence and enjoy the little things
  • Vulnerability
  • Breathing deep
Enneagram 3 Growth Tips
Here are some important growth tips for type 3!

Stepping Into Growth As An Enneagram 3

So how can we move from stress and growth as an enneagram 3? To 3s, this growth number can sound misaligned. “I thought my growth would be to be more of a 9? You want me to be a loyal and protective 6? I’d rather keep winning at life!”

We think that our growth number means that we have to forgo our personality but this is not the truth. Type 3s, you are meant to be your ambitious and driven self and it would be ridiculous to ask you to be any different!

Remember that growth for you, type 3, isn’t just about the actions you do, it’s about the mindset you embrace.

We can often think we are stepping into our enneagram’s growth number by doing different things in our reality when, in fact, we are just avoiding change.

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Enneagram 3 Achiever Journal

While the Enneagram 3 growth is about resting in general, the deeper part of the Achievers’ growth is about learning to find higher life enjoyment and deeper relaxation from building connections.

The core of type 3 growth means learning to see past work goals, health goals, and travel goals and start looking at what your goal for living is. What do you want your life to feel like? What’s the big picture desire?

While having goals is necessary for your fulfillment, start noticing when they are out of alignment with what you truly want.

A healthy 3 learns to recognize when they are feeling unworthy + burnt out and say “Okay, I recognize how I am chasing success right now because I feel like I’m not enough. What do I need right now? What is my big-picture goal? Who do I need to connect with? “

Try recognizing any time you start using your deadly sin of deceit to get on peoples’ good side and focus on cultivating authenticity.

Step into your growth, type 3, and do this Enneagram 3 guided meditation!

Type 3 can embrace their growth by making time for fun, repeating worthiness affirmations, spending time with people they love, finding their soul purpose, and taking a mini-vacation to do all of their favorite things.

Give yourself permission to own your current success rather than chase more.

When you are in your stress and over-working, ask yourself “What would I want to do if I believed I was already more than enough?”

How do you step into growth as an enneagram 3? Let us know in the comments. Hope this blog helped you understand the stress and growth of the Enneagram 3!

Grab the free enneagram cheatsheets before you go to learn everything you need to know about each type.

Related Blogs:

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Enneagram 3 Disintegration and Integration
Enneagram 3 in Stress and Growth
Enneagram 3 Stress & Growth Signs + Growth Tips
Signs Of Stress and Growth Enneagram 3

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